Thursday, February 25, 2021

Nectar of Supreme Knowledge

The path of embodying the Nectar of Supreme Knowledge is a thogh one and available to beings ready to submit their lower nature to the Divinity within at the apex-point of one's Soul's evolution. The ark of my terrestial history includes decades worth of mystical experiences. . .and I know that even my intitially feeble attempts at unpacking not only their significance, but the inner processess of spiritual and supramental Self-reavealment, were not influenced by personal feelings, brain-altering substances or intuitive opinions. Soul-literate scientist (Supramental Yogic Science field) focuses on fact-based (objective) empirical data,fact-checked by those who are qualified. . .
Because the knowledge of the Soul level evolution is the least known, I feel compelled to bring to the world stage this Grace-given Gift. Bring the Gift of Illumination that guides its working and the Power/Conscious Will that determines its results (Divine Revelations) all the way to Supermind and Beyond. 'Beyond'? - in Sri Aurobindo's cosmology named, "the supreme Sachichidananda which is above all" and realised in the supramental plane which can only be comprehended by Supermind.

Gopi Krishna reminds us: "All who have written on the subject have given their own symptoms openly and plainly. That is the tradition. And from their descriptions, one can compare one's own condition."

The hardest thing for me was to articulate what I was destined to see/know in a such a way that honors the Integrity of what introduced itself to the awareness of my non-biological Soul/Light Being. I already knew I was receiving Communication of the Divine Logos from the source of its Nature, and was determined to describe those transpersonal/supramental events to the best of my ability, even though I knew my writing style was lame. Happy to say it/my writng improved quite substancially over time.

Revelatory/supramental knowledge - which is clearly a transpersonal event - is not well received by minds which view Depth's data empirical evidence through the lens of mind incapable of comprehending the subtlety of meaning couched within the written word.

Those of us who have been called to bridge the gap between Humanity and Divinity, are not doing this for self-glorification. Such motive is foreign to me/us, such notion comes from egoic conception. We already know we are humanity's servants. We also know that we are 'flaunting innocently' what we were destined to know, and obey the inner call of our/my vocation.
Innocent Humility protects us from becoming defeated in the face of much opposition, because we know that 'supramental knowing' is Grace-given to a being who passes the 'Innocent Mind', test. Innocent Humility in its most radical sense can never be squashed by desire-mind and its insulting tactics, because we are performing the Will of the one Supreme Spirit (by whatever name).
Reasearch supported Depth data in Yogic science is not everyone's cup of tea, and this is as it should be. Those who aspire to become transparent to the Depths of the Divine are advised to:
"Open your soul to the Eternal - but it must be the eternal that draws your strength and beauty,
not desire for growth. For in one case you develop in the luxuriance of purity,
in the other you harden by the forcible passion for personal status." - author unknown.

When I read that passage, (long time ago) I thought this is it! That's the secret. I never aspired to be spiritual, didn't read esoteric texts, still the Supreme Shakti/Kundalini Goddess grabbed me by the scruff of my neck and performed a complete Kosmic makeover. I was 'allowed' to see/know the Nectar of Supreme Knowledge because I was 'ready' to see/feel/know it.

"Evil is the fruit of a spiritual ignorance it will disappear only by the growth of a spiritual consciousness and the light of spiritual knowledge. The division of being from the being of others can only be healed by removing the divorce of our nature from the inner Soul-reality, by abolishing the veil between our becoming and our self-being, by bridging the remoteness of our individuality in Nature from the Divine Being who is the omnipresent Reality in Nature and above Nature. . .
But the last division to be removed is the scission between this Nature and the Supernature which is Self-Power of the Divine Existence. Even before the dynamic Knowledge-Ignorance is removed, while it still remains as an inadequate instrumentation of the spirit, the supreme Shakti or Supernature can work through us and we can be aware of her workings; but it is then by a modification of her light and power so that it can be received and assimilated by the interior nature of the mind; life and body.
But this is not enough; there is indeed an entire remoulding of what we are into a way and power of the divine Supernature. The integration of our being cannot be complete unless there is a transformation of the dynamic action; there must be an uplifting and change of the whole mode of Nature itself and not only some illumination and transmutation of the inner ways of the being.
An eternal Truth-Consciousness (*Supermind) must possess us and sublimate all our natural modes into its own modes of being. knowledge and action; a spontaneous truth-awareness, truth-will, truth-feeling, truth-movement, truth-action can then become the integral law of nature."
-Sri Aurobindo, excerpt from The Life Divine/ Book 2, Part 2: The Knowledge of the Spiritual Evolution

Precisely! This is why years ago *long before I saw this passage* I wrote, 'strictly speaking my body doesn't belong to me anymore.'

Wednesday, January 6, 2021

Illuminations From Beyond The Intellect

Spirit science and its empirical data/evidence (disclosed to the eye of Spirit), is as complex,
and at the same time, as subtle as the most advanced study of particle physics (disclosed to the
eye of mind and its intellect).
The difference between these two disciplines lie in the fact that Spirit science requires one to
reach the deepest developmental level (which takes the evolving soul-personality eons of epochs to master),before the: "relative and ultimate, individual and universal, body and mind, bliss and wisdom, male and female--all dualities--are integrated
in this experience of fulfillment." Quote from: The Tibetan Book of the Dead (my copy penned by Robert A.F. Thurman)
In other words, it takes countless of lifetimes to become a proper instrument through which the Revelatory Absolute flows into the world of Form.

I wrote Illuminations From Beyond The Intellect (originally titled somt else) in 2010. It got the edit-expanded treatment in 2017,after I chanced upon for-me-verifying Sri Aurobindo's words. Because of the relevance of this developmental line/intelligence, I decided to give Illuminations From Beyond The Intellect the bump-up treatment.

This is what I wrote in 2010
Couple of nights ago, again, my brain was flooded with flute-like Sound. This Sound's flute-like melody kept humming along
seemingly without ceasing . . .because each time (many times) I woke up in this dimension I heard its very pleasant, several-notes-long melody. During the waking hours I am aware of it faintly
I have no doubt that this Kosmic Chant current is the carrier of those periodically heard 'signals' I've been perceiving with either the left brain hemisphere, or the right.
I described before the difference beetween the 'qualities' of Information each side carries, but will include quick recap: The 'signals' (info) perceived with left side/ear, are charged with oft times extremely negative emotions/intentions (thoughtforms) when someone in cyberland (Integral Life forum) gets triggered by my writing, I see/feel those thoughtforms in all their aggressive glory. . .I could say more about this, but am chosing not to.
On the other hand, those with right ear perceived (flute-like) 'signals', are the carriers of very sweet-loving energy intention/information.

* Edit Note: 29/08/2017
In 2013 I chanced upon information about this particular type of Divine Siddhi (activated in the Superconscious field of the mind),
called 'Prakamaya' and 'Vyapati' - in auromere.wordpress. com/2010/12/sri-aurobindo-on-synchronicity, and received permission from Mr. Sandeep
to quote:
"The capricious spark of intuition which briefly flashed during occurences of synchronicity ripens in self-realized sages into highly
refind powers (Siddhis) called 'Prakamaya' and 'Vyapati'. It is through Prakamaya that one gains knowledge of "present states of mind,
feeling, sensation etc. of others, and "it is with Vyapati, that we communicate anything we have in our systems, thought, feeling power,
etc. to another. Sri Aurobindo explained, "every thought, feeling, sensation or other movement of consciousness in us create a wave or
current which carries it out into the world-consciousness around and there it enters into any person who is able to and allowed to receive
it. Half at least of our habitual thoughts and feelings are such unconscious borrowings." Record of Yoga, p.20.

Today (same day) I chanced upon gloriously verifying information on (Divine) Sound and Light. The following quotes are from:
the motherdivine. com/naam-or-word-the-sound-principle shtml
"In Yoga Sandhaya, an elaborate account is given by the practice of "hearing shabd" + "In the Rig Veda and the Atlun Veda there are hymns
in praise of Shabd." + "A Yogin ouught to sit in Sidha Asan, and adopting Vaishnavi Mudra, should hear within him the "Sound" coming from
the right side." + "The flute of Krishna (*heard it many times) is symbolic of the same Sound alegorically explained. This Sound is the
source of all revelation to the Master-souls, wheteher Hindus. Muslims, Christians, and contless others, were conversant with the practice
of the Word, though they did not not necessarily expound it as regular science. Most of them tell of Anhad Shabd only, leading up to
Und and Brahmand or the subtle and cosmic regions. But perfect saints, irrespective of whether they belonged to one religion or the other
have gone beyond this and hhave spoken of Sar Shabd and Sat Shabd as well, and of regions beyond Branhmand (Par-Brahmand, i.e, Sach Khand,
Alkah and Agm Deshas). + "You can see His Light when your inner eye is opened. And you can hear His voice when his inner ear is opened."

The following quote is from wikipedia. org/wiki/Surat_Shabd_Yoga -- in Kripal Singh words:
"Those who have mastered this path have finally merged with the Supreme Lord in His Absolute, Nameless and Formless State. The Creator,
the Absolute, projects itself into form that assumes too primary attributes: Light and Sound. (Word for Naam) and Light are primal
manifestations of God when He projects Himself into Creation. In His nameless state He is neither light nor darkness, neither sound nor
silence, but when He assumes shape and form, Light and Sound emerge as His primary attributes."

Based on my experience, Kripal Singh's assertion is true, but partial. . .One whose eternal/non-biological fulfills her 'ancient plan',
(at the zenith-point of her evolution) unites with the ESSENCE (Blissananda) of the Supreme Beloved, bears witness to new revelation.
It can be captured by this simple phrase: 'What I am is Love and what I have is Bliss in union with everything that's arising'.

With deep gratitude to Mr. Sandeep from auromere press.com/2009/07/vedic-vak-four-levels-of-sound, for another (for me verifying) information.

"1. Para-Vak is the highest form of sound. It issues from the Supernal Ether that build the various worlds preexist in an undifferentiated state.
2. Pashyanti in sanskrit means "seeing speech". Pashyanti is the sound vibration heard in the causal worlds. A sage whose consciousness is
concentrated in the causal body is able to "glimpse" a Truth in a vision or revelation. Knowledge is aquired in the inner mind by sight without
the use of of reasoning faculty or sensory data.
3. Madhamaya (Middle) is the sound as perceived in the subtle or Pranic world. A good example of this would be thought-forms held in our minds.
4. Vaikhari is the lowest form of sound and it signifies outword expression. This is the spoken word emerging from the throat."

* Will add, the above mentioned 'cosmic chant' lasted for about two years - maybe longer. I'm pretty sure I mentioned the day it started, Whatver
it was that needed fine-tuning has reached its apex-point and integrated itself into my body-mind-Soul system. I hear still the constant,
crystal-like (extremely subtle) spinning sound vibration within my interiority as well as without (aura filed). . . as well as the 'signals',
when someone gets triggered either positively or negatively by my writng.

Thursday, November 19, 2020

She Speaks

"A Soul shall wake in the Inconscient's house; The mind shall be God-vision's tabernacle; The body intuitions instrument, And life a channel for God's visible power".
-Sri Aurobindo (Savitri)

One whose nature formed progressively around its Divine center - in the course of countless lives - 'reports' Divine Truths that can't be spoke, only experienced. We use words as containers into which Revelation's subtlety of significance is 'poured'. . .Now we realize that the Immortal Soul's nature is the same Essence as her Beloved.
At this stge-point, She has the authority to declare:

Who I am is Supreme Love and what I have is Supreme Bliss
I am neither gross nor subtle
I am the Nectar of Divine Knowledge
In union with all Reality in all realms of creation.

At this Kosmic address, one's Liberated Soul becomes a conscious Partner of the Divine Beloved. . .She exists to serve the ever-expanding evolution of understanding
of the God state. . .The She whose veil no mortal has lifted, is the perfect Instrument through
which the Divine Force-Power Baptizes the visible and invisible worlds,
without uttering a single word. (The River of Light Revisited April 2019, unpacks this topic)

In other words: God realized Soul remains eternally with the fathomless depth and mystery of the Supreme Beloved, not as 'concept', not as'nothing', but actually.

* Cautionary Note: One who aspires to become God realized through the spiritual bypassing route, will create much mysery. Some think that by acknowledging unhealed psycho-emotional wounding and unresolved developmental needs can be transcended by thinking: 'now that know this about me - know, I am selfish, greedy,
jealous, angry, that I crave status, etc. - I can rise above it', doesn't work. Psycho-emotional wounding can only be released at the level it was created. My post Healer's Note, adresses this topic. *

When all desire vanishes, noble qualities arise. One whose personal egoism is no more, becomes the embodiment of traits such as: simplicity, altruism, nonatachment to fruit of our works, free from the pleasure of domination, are jealous of none, and free from indulgence in petty deeds. Does this mean we are incapable of facing the bully and breaking his/her joy of domination?
Spiritual love is not a sentimentality, it's a permanent state of being that surpasses human comprehension. My spiritual peer Sri Aurobindo declared that spiritual love is a, "Power more ruthless than Love, happier than heaven."

Noble character traits are carriers of high-order frequency which holographically affects all dimensions of creation simultanously.
One whose mind is without the stain of disturbance, becomes
the channel through which high-order freqencies enter the world of Form.
When no longer driven by personal desire, but an impersonal drive of the Conscious Love/Power (not generated on human plane), the Divine Person (Liberated Soul) "Brings the fiers of the splendour of God into the human abyss" - Sri Aurobindo's words from A God's Labour (poem).

Sri Yukteswar reminds us:
"The deeper the Self-realization of a man, the more he influences the wholle worlduniverse by his subtle vibrations and the less he himself is affected by the phenomenal flux."

It is worth noting that, once one knows who we are at the deepst core of our being, concepts like 'special' looses all meaning. . .
And when I declare: 'Not I, but That which animates me speaks from the source of its Nature for the benefit of all beings', I mean it literally. . .(For) This is the true meaning of Divine Revelation.

I will end this reflection in Sri Aurobindo's words: Excerpt from:
Letters on Yoga - Planes and Parts of Being intyoga.online.fr

"Our (Yoga) having realised Sachichidananda in the spiritualised mind plane proceeds to realise it in the supramental plane. The supreme supracosmic Satchichidananda is above all. Supermind might be described as its power of self-awareness and world-awareness, the world being known as within itself and not outside. So to live consciously in the supreme Sachchichidananda one must pass through the Supermind. (skip)
The full dynamic truth of Sachichidananda and the universe and its consequence
cannot be grasped by any other consciousness than Supermind, because the
instrumentation in all other planes is inferior and there is therefore disparity
between the fullness of the static experience and the incompleteness of the
dynamic power, knowledge, result of the inferior light and power of other planes."

Tuesday, July 14, 2020

Standing Naked in the Crowd of Ideas

Edit-Expanded 2022-05-19

Now and again,  my poetic voice compels me to condense  into few stanzas that, which took many years of  Soul level experiences, and its contemplative conclusions baptized with  sweat, blood and tears, cross-checked with my community of the adequate. . . In other words, (as evidenced by what I share) it takes many years of solitude and 'natural' (not forced)  surrender to the Supreme Divine,  countless Soul level Initiations and  Kundalini style karma burning, experiences,  prepared me for  the opportunity to bear witness to what I was destined to See/Feel/Know. . .
Standing Naked in the Crowd of Ideas, (poem)  uses  terminologies that can be found in most mystery traditions. Words like 'Angel',  'Goddess of Clear Light',  are terms for the fully ascended Soul  (because Her Essence is identical with the Supreme Divine).
The word 'naked'  implies  that, even the most exalted mind and its intellect doesn't have access to the domain where the  Divine Mystery  reigns. . .The Mystery of the Ineffable unveils its 'secrets' to the living Soul  at the apex of Her evolution. . .The She - who I sometimes call 'the Queen of Bliss' - speaks without uttering a single word through one who becomes completely transparent to the Depths of the Divine.
It takes a very long time for the custodians of supramental  Knowledge, to arrive at the stage-point where the vanity of the intellct's wisdom destroy's iteself in an empty space of Pure Knowing. Spiritual poetry word-bridges the personal I with God (by whatever name), by weaving into words the subtlety of meaning.
The one  I named my 'primary spiritual peer', Sri Aurobindo, knew, and brilliantly stated why the Supramental Yoga's 'perfection' takes a long time:
 
The Divine in his essence infinite and his manifestation too is multitudinously
 infinite. If that is so, it is not likely that our true integral perfection in being and in nature can come by one kind of realisation alone; it must combine many different strands of divine experience.
It cannot be reached by the exclusive  pursuit of of a single line of identity that is raised to its absolute; it must harmonise many aspects of the Infinite. An Integral consciousness with a multiform dynamic experience is essential for the complete transformation of our nature.

- Sri Aurobindo,  excerpt from: The Synthesis of Yoga


Cast in the language of the Soul, STANDING NAKED IN THE CROWD OF IDEAS, transcends the symbol-imagery of the intellect and its psychology:

The sacrificed intellect burnt up in the
Fires of the Mystical Heart, is free of concepts and ideas
Which mercilessly suck dry the vital powers of the
Goddess Clear Light.
The She Who Has Been, Is, And Will Be

Whose veil no mortal being has lifted
Speaks through One who stands naked in a crowd of ideas.
 (The) Angel of Profound Inner Illumination, whispers:
"Know Truth from your own experience.
Transparent tranquility, limitless calm and bliss
Will find you  in the arms of the She who sees the Self
 Present in all beings and all beings existing in the Self Divine."

* How is such a thing possible? The law of Bliss Similarity Coherence, links the human Bliss Body (non-biological Soul) with the Essence of the Supreme Beloved.
 In this context, Sri Aurobindo's term, "The supreme supracosmic Sachichidananda, is above all", means the same as 'the Essence of the Supreme Beloved'.

And, again, in Aurobindo's words excerpt from:  Savitri, Book Three, Canto Two, pg 314 - a perfect example of spiritual poetry at its finest.

Alone Her hands can change Time's dragon base.
Her's is the mystery of the Night concealed;
The spirit's alchemist energy is hers;
She is the golden bridge, the wonderful fire.
The luminous heart of the Unknown is she,
A power of silence in the depths of God;
She is the Force, the inevitable Word,
The magnet of our difficult ascent,
The Sun from which we kindle all our suns,
The Light that leans from the unrealised Vasts,
The Might of all that never yet came down.
All Nature dumbly calls to her alone
To heal with her feet the aching throb of life
And break the seals on the dim soul of man
And kindle her fire in the closed heart of things.


If curious to re-visit Silver Goddess Ray?
www.spiritspeaks-theofilia.blogspot.ca/2010/02/silver-goddess-ray.html

Monday, July 6, 2020

Why Sri Aurobindo Is Cool

American writer, author of over 32 books published and translated into 34 languages, dealing with topics of sociology, philosophy, mysticism, politics, ecology, psychology and spiritual evolution, Ken Wilber, recognised Sri Aurobindo's genius and literary contribution. Including short quote of praise of this brilliant mind (among others) from article titled:
The Evolution of Enlightenment - published in 2002, in What Is Enlightenment journal - and link to, Why is Aurobindo Cool, penned by Craig Hamilton.

"In a sense, the nondual realization, which at least became a historical realization for a fair number of people right around the turn of the century, including Sri Aurobindo, is still unfolding. I mean its, the world of form keeps unfolding, keeps evolving--spirit's own self-expression keeps unfolding--and it happens, as far as I can tell, to build on what it did yesterday, which is why evolution is indeed an unfolding event in the world of form. So as this incarnational nonduality, this ultimately ecstatic tantric nonduality itself, began to unfold, and its forms of manifestation began to unfold, you find that by the time you get to people like Sri Aurobindo, there's such a full-bodied understanding of this process. 
Even though some of the earlier sages were ultimately enlightened for their time, there's a richness, an  unfolding, a resonance of spirit's own incarnational understanding in some of the recent sages that just give you goose bumps.&
Under those circumstances, the type of descent that Sri Aurobindo was talking about, the descent of the supermind, is something that he certainly thought would be increacing in frequency as evolution continued. And I think that's the case".

I was not surprised when I read that Aldoux Huxley, Nobel laurate Pearl S. Buck, and others independently nominated Sri Aurobindo for the Nobel Prize in Literature.

I borrowed this blog's title from Craig Hamilton's article tilted: Why Sri Aurobindo is Cool:
I can't post direct links, but am more than happy to include one cool snippet from it - and if interested, check out the article at
https://journalofyoga.org/aurobindocool.pdf

"Almost all religious and mystical traditions, East and West, ultimately see the goal of spiritual practice as some kind of vertical lift off, out of this world into either a transcendent beyond, a heaven, or a final cessation in nirvana. Sri Aurobindo had the audacity to say that this view was a mistake. A big mistake. He even had the chutzpa to say it was a mistake made by Shankara and the Buddha."

Saturday, May 9, 2020

Happily Blaming my WAYS on Karma

Some months ago one particularly nasty  gaslighter (man) on Facebook -- Integral Global  group open to public -- insisted I need to urgently  seek help for my mental condition.  Few snippets of what he said to me: "you come across to me as a milder version of Adi Da (...)  (who) turned out to be an absolutely pathological nightmare. " +  "you come across as someone with either temporal lobe epilepsy, bipolar disorder, or a history of deep trauma that has produced dissociative states and grandiose coping skills."
That, I suffer from "delusional preoccupations". All that, and much more he told me,  because he thinks he is enlightened and his job is to declare me delusional, etc.  Been there, danced this crazy dance with other not enlightened  minds  calmly.  I am  happy to say he left the group.

Of course I am all that he says I am, because this is what his ego/surface mind and its intellect sees.
Of course I  have been  mentally ill all of my life! How else  can one explain the altruism my twelve year old was capable of the day she did something so kooky, it made her heart glad.
True story:
I remember well how excited my twelve year old self was when I gathered enough money for my pass to see a movie. I accomplished this feat by collecting enough bottles and washed with sand and water, before taking them to the recycling station, in an exchange for some cash.
All of town's kids (in Poland) were in same anticipatory mood to see the movie. I left the house early and it turned out others did too, because the line was long already. This show was a one day event.
We waited patiently till the theater's ticked counter opened, and then slowly but surely inched closer and closer to the desired goal. Unfortunately, by the time I got to the  ticked window, the lady behind the counter yelled out "last ticket!" - to those (still many) standing in line behind me.
So, what does this insane kid do?  I turned to the boy behind me and said, "go ahead, you can have it". He said, "are you sure?".....  I nodded 'yes'. . . .  and,  my lil' heart was happy for him!

I was definitely insane the day I decided to end a cold war between couple of girlfriends (at work). Those two started each day with hugs and cheerful talk-sharing...until they stopped  and wouldn't even look at each other.  I had no idea what circumstance brought on this stand off, but  after few days of their mutual silent treatment, I spoke to one of them - the one who seemed sadder than the other -  by gently encouraging her to go up to her friend and ask: "are you still  mad at me?" I said, her friend looks sad and might be ready to talk.   . .Minutes later they were both yelling! (releasing hurt feeling), and within minutes their friend-love was back on track.

I remember well  the day I got really angry when I heard one of our (co-worker)  friend's teeth got knocked out by a bully,  and confronted him.  . .My action inspired others to stand up to him, and the bully fired himself the next morning.  The boss thanked me "for what you did".
I wrote about this incident in 'The Green Eyed Monster'? (I have green eyes)

I am definitely  mentally ill, because even though on strict budget, I helped to build a water well somewhere in Africa (through Christian Ministry organization).

Yeah, I must have been deeply traumatized,  when my indignant four year old self, declared:
"I will dance for God!", when Gran tried to teach me prayers. Gran told me this story with  eyes shining tenderly when I was a young teen.
I was  very insane because I often danced on a way to school to express the JOY I was feeling.
I danced on a beach alone   under the sky's  star-studded canopy ... how insane is that for a 19 years old?

Chasing butterflies in fragrant with wild flowers meadow was so much fun!  Making flower wreaths and wearing them....sure sign of  lunacy! - and am happy to say there is no cure for that.
Hanging out on tree branches and singing sweetly? Definitely very strange...but  am glad no one placed me in the asylum for the insane.

I had very intelligent parents and tons of friends and several siblings  to interact with, but I also craved solitude.  In a very secluded part of the garden I  performed all manner of bodily contortions and called it 'gymnastics'. Many years later (in Canada),  learned that those contortions were very advanced yoga poses. . .In this very spot, in dream state I found chunks of pure gold, and knew that the  Vision signified: 'only within your innermost interiority  one has access to something precious, something which book knowledge can't give.'

To some, my 'noble' character traits  and decades worth of Depth data in spiritual science, are interpreted as 'sickness'. One who doesn't know me and doesn't comprehend what forces animate me, has no choice but think this. . .And if I was psychologically fragile during the many years of being bullied by gaslighters in all their furious glory, I would have become a total wreck years ago. And the reason no one can 'brake' me, is because I have been in a permanent Samadhi state -- or Grace bestowed Peace and Bliss, the result of the Descent of Divine Peace, the descent of Force/Power, the descent of Light -- for a long time. Soul infused personality doesn't fear other's judgments, is not at all caught up in a patterns of people pleasing or controlling tactics. . .In other words, the Sovereign One can't be bullied into submission by emotional manipulators. Once the Holy Spirit / Kundalini Goddess grabbed me by the scruff of my neck and showed me who the Boss is, I prayed: YOUR WILL NOT MINE BE DONE! This is why I unopologetically bear witness to what was DONE to me and boldly declare Divine Revelations.

My spiritual peer Sri Aurobindo affirms this:
"The ascent is the first step, it is a means for the descent. It is the descent of new consciousness attained by the ascent that is the stamp and seal of the Sadhana. & This Yoga demands a full ascension of the whole lower or ordinary consciousness to join the spiritual above it and a full descent of the spiritual (eventually supramental) into the mind, life and body to transform it. The total ascent is impossible as long as sex drive blocks the way; the Descent is dangerous so long as sex-drive is powerfulin the vital."
 I happily blame my 'ways' on:
'This is the Way of the Divine-Love-in-Action  and I blame it on Karma'
 (the causes set in motion in prior incarnation manifesting their results in this one).

The me, whose heart broke open many years ago felt compelled to recite a Prayer for Humanity's healing at noon. The pain of being aware of humanity's suffering compelled me to beg ascended beings (Saints)  to:  "help us because we don't know what we're doing".
In my mind's eye I imagined my Angel self hovering above Earth's orbBlessing its beings with Divine Light flowing through my hands...or, 'sending healing energy'  to all beings by placing hands on the globe,  felt very normal to me.
I have been know in Yogic (awake) sleep state to Bless beings standing along river's bank with the Sign of the Holy Cross,  while floating above gently flowing river's currents. . .
The same Love-River-Light made Pure by cultivating noble virtues,  I saw with the eye of contemplation  flowing out of my Heart chakra in all its eye-dazzling glory (not same experience as the one I shared in The River of Light, post).

What some call "pathological nightmare",  to others it is something else. Some think that the evolving personality is the same entity as the non-biological Light being/Soul. Sri Aurobindo reminds us:

"The psychic and spiritual transformation are within our mental conception: The supramental has a radically different awareness of things. Mentality cannot know its nature. It can only be known via the spiritualised mind. It can only begin to understand Supermind when we have connected to spiritualised mind. Our personal endeavor and aspirationn cannot reach Supermind; our is the life of ignorance. The higher spiritual planes create their own formulations in the depths within us..."

Edit-including 2021-05-27 William James words: his retort to the 'medical materialism, folks -- which folks like me are grateful for.

"We're surely all familiar in a general way with this method of discerning states of mind for which we have an antipathy. "Medical materialism" seems, indeed, a good appellation for the simple-minded system of thought which we are considering. Medical materialism finishes up St. Paul byy calling his vision on the road to Damascus a discharching lesion of the occipital cortex, he being an epileptic. It snuffs out St. Teresa as an hysteric, St. Francis of Assissi as an hereditary degenerate. George Fox's discontent with the shams of his age and his pining for spiritual veracity, it treats as symptoms of a disordered colon. All such mental tensions, it says, are, due to the perverted action of various glannds which physiology will yet discover."

Divine Grace & Guidance

Edit-expanded SPIRIT IS THE CREATIVE GROUND OF ALL NEW POSSIBILITIES Empowerment through the Holy Spirit is a central theme in Christian the...